So, here we are. I have less than twelve hours left here in Nanjing before I fly back to Boston and I can hardly believe my time abroad has already come to an end. People say "time flies" but these past four months have truly felt like no more than two. I guess when everyday is filled with new activities, hours of studying new material, and discovering new things about Chinese culture, you simply don't have much time to reflect.
Now, that may sound silly coming from the guy who has been updating a blog throughout the entire trip, but there's still so much that never even made it to these pages. Given the time, I could fill dozens of blogs with all of my escapades and maybe one day, when I'm not so distracted, I'll sit down and write a book or something. But for now, a blog post approximately every two weeks has been all I've been willing to commit to. There've simply been too many things to do/see/trip over/throw at Sophie/etc... to warrant spending any more time on my computer.
And not all of these things have been as extraordinarily exciting as examining the Terracotta Army or trekking through mountains in the remote Chinese wilderness. Nearly as vivid are my memories of sitting on the ground with my host mom while playing with Duoduo, having small conversations in Chinese with friendly old people on the bus, and trying to take group naps with two other nearly-fully-sized people in a twin bed. These moments might not make the traditional highlight reel or come up as often during casual conversation in the upcoming months, but they're just as important to me.
Other items that I've checked off on the "Bucket List I Didn't Know I Had"; bike on the Xi'an city wall, ride a camel in the desert, get a haircut in downtown Shanghai, shoot a bow and arrow in a Chinese amusement park, eat a donkey burger (and love it), teach English to a first grade class, watch unexpected fireworks from the balcony of a hotel room that you booked two days prior, the list goes on and on and on... For my first venture outside of my home country, I'd say that I did a pretty good job.
I constantly try to remind myself of just how lucky I am to be able to go on these amazing adventures, to meet these fascinating people, and to spend so much of my time just learning about the world around me. It is a privilege that I try not to take for granted. This is one of the many deeper lessons that I will take away from this trip; there are so many in this world who barely have the means to survive let alone tour the globe. And there are those whose government does not allow them the freedoms that I have been allowed, to speak freely about what I believe in and what I think is right. I often find myself marveling at how well this trip has turned out in every respect and I am so thankful.
I can't deny that luck has had something to do with this trip's massive success, but I must also give credit to another element of my life that never ceases to amaze me in its utility: improvisational comedy. Back at UMass, I am part of an improv comedy group called Mission:IMPROVable. Not only does it allow me to spend hours on end laughing hysterically with people I love, but also it has taught me some amazing life lessons, the most relevant of which (in the context of China) is "saying YES." I can not count the number of times that my study abroad experience was enriched because I was comfortable saying, "Yes." Simply put, it is impossible for you to find out if you love something if you never try it, whether it be food, a hobby, or something more abstract. Trust me; the next time you are in a situation where you are hesitant to do something because you think you might embarrass yourself, take a deep breath, and just do it. I know this sounds like something out of an ABC Family TV special, but I implore you to say "yes" more. What's the worst that could happen? Fortune favors the bold.
The next big thing I want to talk about is a bit more serious. As you're probably aware, the current status of international politics is, to say the least, unstable. There is a lot of hate being spewed from all corners of the globe and being so far away from the US provides me with a unique perspective. First of all, something interesting happens when you live with a new family; you start to care about them as if they were actually your family. You start to appreciate their mannerisms, their laughs, their hopes and dreams. You start to wish for them to succeed and you feel good when you connect with them on a deeper level. You start to notice the nuances to their personalities and their motivations behind all of the things they believe and do. I realized one day that I love my host family. And when you start to love someone that lives in another country, it starts to make you sick when you hear people in your home country talk about the people in that other country as a single entity, as faceless masses with no identity other than what is provided through stereotypes.
When you eat, sleep, work, learn, play - when you live with people of a different culture, this tendency to group individuals by their country of origin begins to fade away. That is why I believe that the greatest lesson to be learned from studying abroad is empathy. Studying abroad has taught me the importance of remembering that each person on this planet is different. Each person has their own special mannerisms, their own laugh, their own hopes and dreams. Each person has their own family, no matter where you live, no matter what you believe. No one can be entirely defined by the groups that they fall under on a census. And I believe that no one is entitled to life on this planet more than anyone else.
Now, this is not to say that cultural differences do not exist. Cultural differences in the US, China, and every other culture in between instill us with tendencies to be sometimes drastically different than our international neighbors. Our values, our norms, and our beliefs often starkly contrast. But it still doesn't change the fact that we're all stuck on the same tiny rock hurtling through space. I believe that we are fully capable of accepting our differences and learning to coexist, even co-prosper, if you will. And, in fact, I find that our vast differences make the world that much more exciting! When everyone has something unique to offer, there is a literally endless amount to learn and experience.
And finally, not only does having more people on the planet make life more exciting, in my experience, it also gives life meaning. I believe it is very important to be able to love yourself without the approval of others and I have many times on this journey found contentment in solitude and self-reflection; however, I also believe that all of the greatest moments of life are spent with people you love. What really fills me with happiness is not just experiencing the limitless things that this world has to offer, but sharing those things with those who you truly enjoy being around.
I met Amy and Sophie in the Hong Kong Airport before we boarded our last flight to Nanjing. Since then, we have been nearly inseparable. They have filled every moment of this trip with uncontrollable laughter and immeasurable joy. They are undeniably brilliant and compassionate people who are never too afraid to make absolute fools of themselves especially in very public places. I didn't know what I was going to find when I came to China, but I certainly never expected to meet two of my best friends. The hardest thing I will do in China will be to say goodbye (for now) to these two.
Sophie and Amy,
I love you both. You have made this adventure so much more meaningful. I already miss you both desperately and I can hardly wait to see you again.
To everyone else reading this,
Thank you for following me throughout the last 3.5 months! It has been an unforgettable journey - one that I hope you have also enjoyed reading about. And hey, if you learned something, that's great too. If you're back in the States, I'm very excited to see you again soon. But you know, it might not be a bad idea to get out of the country for while if you get the chance. Turns out there's a pretty big world outside of the US.
And until you get up and go, you'll never know what you might find.
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